I Take My Chances

I Take My Chances
by Mary Chapin Carpenter

Now some people say that you shouldn't tempt fate, and for them I cannot disagree/ But I never learned nothing from playing it safe, I say fate should not tempt me/ I take my chances/ I don't mind working without a net/ I take my chances/ I take my chances every chance I get

Huh.  Apparently, the mobile blogging post I tried over the weekend didn't pan out.  I'll have to see if it shows up in the next few days, or just disappeared into the ether.  Here's the basic gist:

This weekend, LB and I had a choir retreat, which took us a few hours from a rendezvous with our donor, but since I was seeing possibly-fertile cervical fluid, I made sure to bring along a few OPKs, just so we'd know if we missed the chance this month, or if it was approaching as the weekend ended.  Saturday afternoon, we finally saw a second line!  Not quite as dark as the control line, but that was good, since we weren't coming back to town until Sunday.

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This afternoon, since the second line was much darker (either as dark or darker than the control, depending on where you look), we contacted our donor and set up AHI #3.  A few hours (and some plow poses later), and I am crossing my fingers for a rising temperature and another 2WW!

We tried a new approach this time - instead of LB injecting the little swimmers into me, and then trying to trap them in place with the Instead cup, I put them into the cup first, and then put it in "pre-loaded."  It worked for a couple of friends, so we are hopeful.  The only complaint from LB with this method is that she doesn't want to be accused of not being involved this time.  Since she made a delicious dinner and cuddled with me afterward, I think she's safe from that.

Depending on how temps and the OPKs look tomorrow, I may see if our donor is available for another try after work tomorrow, just to increase our chances.

Still I Rise

Still I Rise
as sung by the Seattle Men's Chorus

Yet still I rise/ Never to give up/ Never to give in against all odds/ Yet still I rise/ High above the clouds/ At times I feel alone/ But still I rise/

I have discovered that the chart gallery of TCOYF is an incredible time-suck.  I can spend hours perusing charts, looking for one or two that are just a little like mine (curious?), and then get all my hopes up based on one woman who, back in 2007, was pregnant despite having weird temperatures.  Result?  I P'dOAS this morning.  And afternoon, since the morning one was a dud.  So, of course, I had to go buy more HPTs, so I could get an accurate result.  Because if the possible ovulation 2 days ago turns out to be an actual O and results in a BFP, I'm going to want to know exactly when it all went down.  Ovulating 3 weeks after doctors expect you to doesn't result in happy due dates, I'm thinking.

Talk about counting chickens before they're hatched!

My hopes are up because my BBT rose yesterday, and is staying high today (still higher than previous temps in this cycle), and fingers are crossed.  As much as they can be while I play piano, that is.  Piano playing has turned out to be a great stress-reliever, as well as a good way to pass time on my day off.  Now that I've completed my errands for the day, I'd best give the dog a bath before her stink sinks into the sofa cushions.

All I Have to Do is Dream

All I have to do is dream
by the Everly Brothers

I need you so, that I could die/ I love you so, and that is why/ Whenever I want you, all I have to do/ Is dream

I'm not much of one for dreaming, at least that I can remember.  I've been keeping a dream journal since I was in college, and I'm still on that same first notebook, about halfway through.  It is very unusual for me to remember a dream in the morning, and even more unusual for me to view the things that happen in the dream as real at the time.  Usually, I am aware that it's a dream even while it's happening.

Last night, I dreamed that this cycle worked, and I was pregnant!  And then, I was huge, and in labor, and totally confused.  I turned to another woman in the room (who turned out to be a friend from high school), and said "but this is way too soon, I just found out I'm pregnant!" and then LB burst in with "no, she's at about 38 weeks.  The time has just flown by.  She's ready."  And then the baby was coming!  Craziness.

When I told LB about the dream, her response was "[high school friend] is NOT going to be anywhere near the room when you're in labor!"  Of course, I'm not planning to give birth in a tropical pool below a waterfall, either, so it's probably not real prophetic.

In my terminal need to prepare for a baby that isn't even a spark in its mama's eye yet, I am knitting a maternity tank top for myself.  I finished the first armhole this evening, and hopefully can  complete the second arm hole and the neck edge soon.  I'll post pictures when it's done, and hopefully will get some use out of it soon :)

When I need you, in my arms/ When I want you, and all your charms/ Whenever I want you, all I have to do/ Is dream.

Do-re-mi

Do-re-mi
from The Sound of Music

Let's start at the very beginning/ A very good place to start/ When you read, you begin with "A, B, C"/ When you sing, you begin with "Do, Re, Mi"/ The first three notes just happen to be "Do, Re, Mi"/ Do re mi fa sol la ti - /

Wait.  I'll make it easier.

Large box of latex gloves...check
oral medication syringe...check
Instead soft cup...check
And, of course, the sterilized jar of microscopic tadpoles...check

And, for the protection of LB, a large towel and a supply of plastic zip-top bags for disposal of gloves, etc.  We don't want any of this to come in contact with her, no way.

Optional:
a DVD, all set up and ready to play
a firm pillow under the towel, for maximum prop-up-age

I meant to get a picture of the whole set up last night, but got distracted beforehand, and then it was too late (once everything's present and ready to go, we get started right away).  Next time, then.

This weekend LB's family brought over a piano, so now I'm able to get up in the morning and sing and play a little before work.  I'd forgotten how relaxing it is to really be able to sing - not just the singing I do at work all day with kids, but paying attention to my tone, and breathing, and really enjoying how I sound.  It's also been pleasantly surprising how much my piano playing has improved since college - apparently all that random practicing of whatever happens by has done some good!

Still no ovulation yet (if it's actually coming, which is a long shot), but BBT is staying low and pretty much around my usual pre-O temps, which I figure has to be a good sign.  And I'm trying to move beyond the stress of work today (shouldn't it be illegal to stress someone out when they're TTC?  I think so), so LB and I are watching a movie and spending quality time at home.  I challenged LB to describe me in one word, and got "sweet," (aww!) "loving" (of course!) and "headstrong" :-P   My words for her?  "smart," "brave," and "gentle."  And so she is.

Just Keep Swimming

Just Keep Swimming
from "Finding Nemo"

Just keep swimming/ Just keep swimming/ Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming/

And, they're off!  Or so we hope.  This evening, after an exciting time folding laundry (ooh!), washing dishes (ah!), and evaluating LB's video for National Boards (eee!), our donor came over with a jar (in a paper bag this time), and we set to work.  The second time was much faster and much less squicky than try number 1, so here's hoping that decreased stress works in our favor. 

And, it's now really late (as LB is pointing out by having her teeth brushed and her pajamas on), so my summary of just what method we're using will have to wait another day.

Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming/